I read it somewhere that you can take a man out of his country, not a country out of the man. I realized it is so true, just a day after i landed in LAX after my one month visit to India.
What am I missing now in this land of opportunities? Almost everything that made my life interesting in the last one month. I wanted to take an account of every small thing to remind me later in my life not to miss having the same fun...
My Morning Bru Coffee... guranteed you can get the same bru coffee here, but what i really miss is shouting "Mom coffee" even before my eye sees the day light...
THE HINDU and NDTV - It is not about the quality of the news agencies, it's about news that affects you , and want to hear, it affects when you hear that your country's policies are good or bad, politicians are good or bad, economy is good or bad. Back here, the news is just talking points for me with someone in the office or some bar.
Time with the family and friends - this is probably the biggest thing you will miss, end of the day what you earn for needs some justification. The question is do you need money to fill your bank balance? Improve the quality of your life with a better car and better house which only "you" use. If you cant spend on people who matter in your life, what is the point?
Thud Thud of my Thunderbird - Oh... I cant explain how it feels to ride that maniac in a traffic filled place, you feel you are the king of the road...
Fourway traffic and riding through it... there is more life "on" the road in India than here.. you feel more competent, more talented when you make a day of driving through those traffic :)
My newborn niece - it is a different feeling, when you wake up in the morning and all you see is your newborn niece next to you, kicking you. You cannot have a better wake up call than those smallest fingers caressing you... Love her and will miss her a lot
Life on the streets... You find so many people ... and so many different people... there is more life on the streets, that make you feel that you belong to a human race.
Mom's food - This needs no explanation to anybody... it is the BEST. PERIOD!
Now back to being a desi here... Because you are desi when you dont belong here...!
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Can four walls and a laptop screen consume you?
Offlate... the most that i see is four walls and a laptop screen. I cant believe that of all people four walls and a laptop screen can consume me so much.. i try to reason... why have i got nothing to do.. i tried my best and am trying my best but all i do is still withing the same 4 walls... We know people from facebook updates... comment happily, click the like to the fotos and updates...
"Oh when will those weekends come" is not exciting anymore... it may be that you have got the same thing to do over the weekend... stare at this never fading light... how did humans fall prey to this four walls and a square foot of aberration of reality! is it only me that feels irritated when four roomies in a house are doing nothing but look into their laptop screen and fail that we havent had a conversation for ours together!
Well I don seem to hold it anymore! i need real people around me...! i need living voices, conversations, small arguments, big discussions, outside world and lot more of fresh air - not the only one i get from my patio! A trivandrum can get interesting and an america can get boring! I did not think both was possible until it happened!
A human is a social animal - when we are social only as avatars on our webpages, facebook updates and orkut scraps - in reality are we pushing ourselves down the value chain ...?
I miss those laughter in office... I miss those rights we used to have on friends at office and home to play pranks on them... I miss having people around - And here i am getting consumed into the same thing that I said I hate..
I am tired of this routine of ever diminishing reality - Things have got to change... I give so much credit to my character being moulded by time and people around me.. I do not want to make this phase of my life where nothing changed in me - I NEED CHANGE... and I will make it happen...
Lets find more than four walls.... I guess travel is a medicine that would heal this! Let me see how far i get with that idea!
Rest in the next!
Friday, April 16, 2010
Have I got so much time... My longlist of wishes are becoming short
Hey... you ... my friend... where have you been... do you know what is happening in my life... Do you know that I have had so much time in my life that I am scribing for the third time within a month... on the brighter side... I am reinventing myself again... I think this is the phase of my life when I have to make a new set of friends... change to my character... a new everything...
Oh yes... everyone changes with time... or atleast me yes... thats why I called my blog the moulds of time... I can quote multiple times that I have changed for good... mostly influenced by my friends..
I have never had so much time in life to try my heart out... Probably this part of my life is called as self-obsession... a rather complicated term would be loneliness ;), but that doesnt seem to exist anymore. I have searched the crevises of my brain cells to find out what I have craved to all my life... and I am completely loving it.
My Age 9 ambition to fly in the sky... I did the sky dive...
My Age 7 wish to learn guitar which stopped with the very first class - an average hindu family doesnt have interests in a guitar which was seen more of a christian instrument (How crazy is that!!!) well yes.. .i am starting to see my fingers getting numb holding the strings to the chords.
Pain cannot be so satisfying :)
My college time wishes to have a built body - never happened... I was too thin.. then once job set in I was adding too much fat... Now yes I am going to the gym everyday... how cool is that..
I don't know how long this will continue... but yeah now a part of my heart is overflowing with an energy of a different kind trying to fight the loneliness and boredom that is currently trying to fill my life...
Oh yes.. finally I found out why... this boredom and loneliness has never set in at anypoint of my life until now. Now I understand how my precious time of discovering myself was lost because of you my friend... No dont frown yet... a large part of my character was made by each friend like you...
Yes everytime I had new set of friend... my character got moulded... This time I guess it is for myself to mould my character... But I dont trust myself that much that I can do a big change to my character..
Well all said and done... time to reinvent myself... let me get going and see how long it lasts...
To ensure that I've listened to my friend who said my blogs were long... and I do a lot of write-talking... this one end's here...
Rest in the Next!
Oh yes... everyone changes with time... or atleast me yes... thats why I called my blog the moulds of time... I can quote multiple times that I have changed for good... mostly influenced by my friends..
I have never had so much time in life to try my heart out... Probably this part of my life is called as self-obsession... a rather complicated term would be loneliness ;), but that doesnt seem to exist anymore. I have searched the crevises of my brain cells to find out what I have craved to all my life... and I am completely loving it.
My Age 9 ambition to fly in the sky... I did the sky dive...
My Age 7 wish to learn guitar which stopped with the very first class - an average hindu family doesnt have interests in a guitar which was seen more of a christian instrument (How crazy is that!!!) well yes.. .i am starting to see my fingers getting numb holding the strings to the chords.
Pain cannot be so satisfying :)
My college time wishes to have a built body - never happened... I was too thin.. then once job set in I was adding too much fat... Now yes I am going to the gym everyday... how cool is that..
I don't know how long this will continue... but yeah now a part of my heart is overflowing with an energy of a different kind trying to fight the loneliness and boredom that is currently trying to fill my life...
Oh yes.. finally I found out why... this boredom and loneliness has never set in at anypoint of my life until now. Now I understand how my precious time of discovering myself was lost because of you my friend... No dont frown yet... a large part of my character was made by each friend like you...
Yes everytime I had new set of friend... my character got moulded... This time I guess it is for myself to mould my character... But I dont trust myself that much that I can do a big change to my character..
Well all said and done... time to reinvent myself... let me get going and see how long it lasts...
To ensure that I've listened to my friend who said my blogs were long... and I do a lot of write-talking... this one end's here...
Rest in the Next!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
A moment between the earth and sky
It was a time of life when you make a larger than mouth decision to play with your life... No I am not talking about getting Married... It was on 28 March 10, Me and Reji decided to go skydiving. I was initially thinking about the tandem jump. That is an advantage of being with people younger than you. They help you shed off some age, even though for a few hours.
We decided to do the Accelerated Free Fall. No strapping to an instructor. Two instructors dive with you on each side, after you deploy your canopy (that's a parachute in a divers lingo) you are on your own.
So we started on a Sunday morning... never have i woken up so early... I was sick in my stomach from what i had the previous night... the drive through Ortega Freeway was beautiful... although i woke in between to check out some views...
The destination was Lake Elsinore a scenic location with a huge Lake (probably to ensure that parachute failures cause less fatality, if the person knows swimming that is) mountains near by.
On a hotter than usual day, we were lucky to be succumbed by the classroom sessions until evening, it was good that we reached an hour late, coz we did not get to jump until sunset.
The classroom sessions were killing because we had the same thing over and over again, i dont blame them because "lives" were at stake. After the 7 Hours training, we got suited up for the test of our courage. The more you started to realize that it was for real that we were going to jump out of a plane at 15000 Ft, the more i saw my classroom session knowledge and confidence going down. The video interview before the jump was probably a gimmick to make sure the fear doesnt set in before you board the flight.
Stepping into the plane a twin engine plane that could hold a couple of dozen skydivers if packed in. It wasnt more comfortable than a local bus travel back in India... the more that i saw the altimeter increasing in feet, the more i was thinking of this as unreal. I remembered one of my collegues saying "I usually pay money to get into a plane not jump out of one" Well it was more of adrenaline, fear, uncertainty, rush .... a lot of mixed emotions shut down my highway to the brains... yes i understood i was forgetting most of what they told me in the classroom sessions :)
I saw that the licenced crazy experience skydivers one by one jumping out even when the plane was making a 45 degree ascent to make to 15000 ft as soon as possible... I did not believe that it was me next. I gathered up all the guts that I had got, and walked behing my reserve instructor to the door. we made the 15000 Ft mark now the newbies get to jump when it seems the plane is horizontal... stable...
I wanted to look down first... I know if I do that I may lose my fear early... or my courage...
but yes it did help... i looked down... did the prop check to get the feel of the air... checked in with both my instructors... jumped out of a freaking plane at 15000 Ft.... It is definitely a mark in my life that i achieved...
As soon as I jumped out, it is a rush you are falling at 120 Miles an hour, trying to balance, with no place to hold on to or stand, the two instructors giving instruction signals to correct your posture... the perfect arch... i need to check my altimeter first time... i did check... i don remember the number i saw in the altimeter... because the G forces acting on you and the fact that i am actual flying at 15000 Ft excited me more than the numbers i should be seeing...
The sixty seconds of free fall was over by the time you did your rituals - the practice touches, circle of awarnes... etc it was an experience i tried explaining to so many of my friends but i cudnt really give them the exact picture... at about 5500 Ft I had to pull ... deploy the canopy...
The moment that I pulled the canopy.. the deployment bag inflated my canopy... the free fall is over... the two trainers deploy at a much lower altitude and hence they continued the free fall.. as soon as you have the canopy over your head... at 5000 Ft it is only you, the silence, you have more time to look how far below is the ground... the enormous view of the Lake elsinore and the sun setting over the Mountains... It was like sitting in a chair, with no worries, looking at possibly one of the best views you could ever see...
Then yes i had to check if my canopy is working, the moment you start steering your canopy the feeling of accomplishment surpases all your fear senses you have. Somehow, the excitement of accomplishing one of my dreams surpassed all other fears, including the fact that I still need to make a safe landing.
When i was young at the age of 9 I had a dream to become a pilot in airforce, the feeling of flying over the mountains and the sky has always facinated me. It was that young pragadeesh in me that was so much jumping out of joy at 4000 Ft. His soul fulfilled, his wishes heard to, his courage regained.
This big guy has to ungrow a little bit to enjoy what he wanted so many years ago. Then i did steer around in the air and heard my instructor on the radio trying to help me get to the landing zone. I did what he asked me to do, right 90 degree turn, a 45 degree left turn, right 90, right 90, Flare!(break!) Flare!! Flare!!!.... I did stand on my feet when i landed my first canopy... I was proud. I wish my dad was there to see my reaction, I dont think he has seen me express so much of accomplishment in life.. except for two other times in my life. One my sister's wedding, me selected to become the Technology solutions Manager for a Business Unit and asked to fly to the US.
I wanted to do dance to my favorite songs... and run around in that field... go and hug my friend... but Alas!.... i had to return to my feet... back to ground and the age/maturity sets in... I am a grown up now although i was still jigging because of that kid dancing within me...
I did the treck back to the Diving school office with my heavy canopy, Heard my instructors say i did pretty good... waited for reji... went and hugged him once he returned... we both were so excited and still digesting the experience ....
I cant believe that after 2 days of the experience I still think abt the whole thing so many times in a day... and sleep with a smile...
A dream achieved... A stunt dared... Mission accomplished.... What next, will I do another jump, will I get the A License to jump on my own... which I want to do so much right now... Will wait for the time to mould me ... and find out..
Here's the video of my jump - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9CQiDosNDQ
Rest in the Next!
We decided to do the Accelerated Free Fall. No strapping to an instructor. Two instructors dive with you on each side, after you deploy your canopy (that's a parachute in a divers lingo) you are on your own.
So we started on a Sunday morning... never have i woken up so early... I was sick in my stomach from what i had the previous night... the drive through Ortega Freeway was beautiful... although i woke in between to check out some views...
The destination was Lake Elsinore a scenic location with a huge Lake (probably to ensure that parachute failures cause less fatality, if the person knows swimming that is) mountains near by.
On a hotter than usual day, we were lucky to be succumbed by the classroom sessions until evening, it was good that we reached an hour late, coz we did not get to jump until sunset.
The classroom sessions were killing because we had the same thing over and over again, i dont blame them because "lives" were at stake. After the 7 Hours training, we got suited up for the test of our courage. The more you started to realize that it was for real that we were going to jump out of a plane at 15000 Ft, the more i saw my classroom session knowledge and confidence going down. The video interview before the jump was probably a gimmick to make sure the fear doesnt set in before you board the flight.
Stepping into the plane a twin engine plane that could hold a couple of dozen skydivers if packed in. It wasnt more comfortable than a local bus travel back in India... the more that i saw the altimeter increasing in feet, the more i was thinking of this as unreal. I remembered one of my collegues saying "I usually pay money to get into a plane not jump out of one" Well it was more of adrenaline, fear, uncertainty, rush .... a lot of mixed emotions shut down my highway to the brains... yes i understood i was forgetting most of what they told me in the classroom sessions :)
I saw that the licenced crazy experience skydivers one by one jumping out even when the plane was making a 45 degree ascent to make to 15000 ft as soon as possible... I did not believe that it was me next. I gathered up all the guts that I had got, and walked behing my reserve instructor to the door. we made the 15000 Ft mark now the newbies get to jump when it seems the plane is horizontal... stable...
I wanted to look down first... I know if I do that I may lose my fear early... or my courage...
but yes it did help... i looked down... did the prop check to get the feel of the air... checked in with both my instructors... jumped out of a freaking plane at 15000 Ft.... It is definitely a mark in my life that i achieved...
As soon as I jumped out, it is a rush you are falling at 120 Miles an hour, trying to balance, with no place to hold on to or stand, the two instructors giving instruction signals to correct your posture... the perfect arch... i need to check my altimeter first time... i did check... i don remember the number i saw in the altimeter... because the G forces acting on you and the fact that i am actual flying at 15000 Ft excited me more than the numbers i should be seeing...
The sixty seconds of free fall was over by the time you did your rituals - the practice touches, circle of awarnes... etc it was an experience i tried explaining to so many of my friends but i cudnt really give them the exact picture... at about 5500 Ft I had to pull ... deploy the canopy...
The moment that I pulled the canopy.. the deployment bag inflated my canopy... the free fall is over... the two trainers deploy at a much lower altitude and hence they continued the free fall.. as soon as you have the canopy over your head... at 5000 Ft it is only you, the silence, you have more time to look how far below is the ground... the enormous view of the Lake elsinore and the sun setting over the Mountains... It was like sitting in a chair, with no worries, looking at possibly one of the best views you could ever see...
Then yes i had to check if my canopy is working, the moment you start steering your canopy the feeling of accomplishment surpases all your fear senses you have. Somehow, the excitement of accomplishing one of my dreams surpassed all other fears, including the fact that I still need to make a safe landing.
When i was young at the age of 9 I had a dream to become a pilot in airforce, the feeling of flying over the mountains and the sky has always facinated me. It was that young pragadeesh in me that was so much jumping out of joy at 4000 Ft. His soul fulfilled, his wishes heard to, his courage regained.
This big guy has to ungrow a little bit to enjoy what he wanted so many years ago. Then i did steer around in the air and heard my instructor on the radio trying to help me get to the landing zone. I did what he asked me to do, right 90 degree turn, a 45 degree left turn, right 90, right 90, Flare!(break!) Flare!! Flare!!!.... I did stand on my feet when i landed my first canopy... I was proud. I wish my dad was there to see my reaction, I dont think he has seen me express so much of accomplishment in life.. except for two other times in my life. One my sister's wedding, me selected to become the Technology solutions Manager for a Business Unit and asked to fly to the US.
I wanted to do dance to my favorite songs... and run around in that field... go and hug my friend... but Alas!.... i had to return to my feet... back to ground and the age/maturity sets in... I am a grown up now although i was still jigging because of that kid dancing within me...
I did the treck back to the Diving school office with my heavy canopy, Heard my instructors say i did pretty good... waited for reji... went and hugged him once he returned... we both were so excited and still digesting the experience ....
I cant believe that after 2 days of the experience I still think abt the whole thing so many times in a day... and sleep with a smile...
A dream achieved... A stunt dared... Mission accomplished.... What next, will I do another jump, will I get the A License to jump on my own... which I want to do so much right now... Will wait for the time to mould me ... and find out..
Here's the video of my jump - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9CQiDosNDQ
Rest in the Next!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
My First ever Net-Scribble!
Ok... after contemplation, procrastination and still perseverant to start a blog... here I am with my first ever blog... I did not understand why people used to "blog"... some people are good at expressing themselves, and some people desperately wanted to express...
Well I have never written until now, probably because this is the second time in my life I got tired of being lazy! :-) :-( .... The first time.. I started reading/writing poems in tamil(my native language) and got a girl friend ;-)... this time I decided i will start my blog... (Hope the trend of getting a girl friend follows ;-)) (I need to stop these smileys... it is all the chat discipline that spoiled me).
I still don't know what i am going to write... or i wouldnt have thought about my first blog... until my good friend, whose blog i often visit, asked me is it just enough if you create a blogger id - yes i created this almost 2 months before my first blog.. he he.
I think this is the period of my life that i have stayed far away from my close friends and family, for a long time, that explains the reason why I'm tired of being lazy... usually I would have had enough things to do than write blogs (none of the activities that I would call 'productive') *grin*
Coming to think of it, the last three years when i was in a boring place like Trivandrum, India I would list the following as activities I was involved in. These are primarily the reasons I did not start a blog:
1. Work - (Yes my routine was start late and end up really late - So I did not have time for this in the evening)
2. Friends and crazy trips - (We would have planned some crazy short planned trips or do nothing weekends which we would spend just spending time)
3. Home trips - Since i stayed far away from home - trips once a month would take all of my weekend+ a day or two.
4. Bike rides - (This used to consume most of my free time during weekends - Now i Miss my Thunderbird)
5. Movies/TV - These were very little of the time that I had spent - very selective on movies and TV
6. Weekend Parties - Parties used to consume an evening and the hangover the next day! Lol!
7. Sleeping - Yes I did spend a good deal of time sleeping (No this can never been the time that i could've spent writing a blog or reading a book... If you dont know me... there is not one book that i have read without dozing off in between multiple times and taking umpteen stops before completing the book...)
Exactly... I haven't done one thing 'productive', but I don repent now, i had one of the best times during the last three years in a dry place like trivandrum...
And to all those who would want to follow my blog... I cant promise you the best written, verbose blog... but raw thoughts as what i would think at the moment... Which is easy to guess from this blog!
Rest in the next!
Well I have never written until now, probably because this is the second time in my life I got tired of being lazy! :-) :-( .... The first time.. I started reading/writing poems in tamil(my native language) and got a girl friend ;-)... this time I decided i will start my blog... (Hope the trend of getting a girl friend follows ;-)) (I need to stop these smileys... it is all the chat discipline that spoiled me).
I still don't know what i am going to write... or i wouldnt have thought about my first blog... until my good friend, whose blog i often visit, asked me is it just enough if you create a blogger id - yes i created this almost 2 months before my first blog.. he he.
I think this is the period of my life that i have stayed far away from my close friends and family, for a long time, that explains the reason why I'm tired of being lazy... usually I would have had enough things to do than write blogs (none of the activities that I would call 'productive') *grin*
Coming to think of it, the last three years when i was in a boring place like Trivandrum, India I would list the following as activities I was involved in. These are primarily the reasons I did not start a blog:
1. Work - (Yes my routine was start late and end up really late - So I did not have time for this in the evening)
2. Friends and crazy trips - (We would have planned some crazy short planned trips or do nothing weekends which we would spend just spending time)
3. Home trips - Since i stayed far away from home - trips once a month would take all of my weekend+ a day or two.
4. Bike rides - (This used to consume most of my free time during weekends - Now i Miss my Thunderbird)
5. Movies/TV - These were very little of the time that I had spent - very selective on movies and TV
6. Weekend Parties - Parties used to consume an evening and the hangover the next day! Lol!
7. Sleeping - Yes I did spend a good deal of time sleeping (No this can never been the time that i could've spent writing a blog or reading a book... If you dont know me... there is not one book that i have read without dozing off in between multiple times and taking umpteen stops before completing the book...)
Exactly... I haven't done one thing 'productive', but I don repent now, i had one of the best times during the last three years in a dry place like trivandrum...
And to all those who would want to follow my blog... I cant promise you the best written, verbose blog... but raw thoughts as what i would think at the moment... Which is easy to guess from this blog!
Rest in the next!
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